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DO NOT GET MARRIED Unless You Ask Your Partner These 15 Questions. Or Else You'll Wish You Had.

We often hear friends wondering where they're making the right move in marrying their significant other. The New York Times surveyed what critical questions partners should be asking each other before taking the final leap, and this list of 15 questions is what relationship experts came back with:

1) Have we discussed whether or not to have children, and if the answer is yes, who is going to be the primary care giver?

2) Do we have a clear idea of each other’s financial obligations and goals, and do our ideas about spending and saving mesh?

3) Have we discussed our expectations for how the household will be maintained, and are we in agreement on who will manage the chores?

4) Have we fully disclosed our health histories, both physical and mental?

5) Is my partner affectionate to the degree that I expect?

6) Can we comfortably and openly discuss our sexual needs, preferences and fears?

7) Will there be a television in the bedroom?

8) Do we truly listen to each other and fairly consider one another’s ideas and complaints?

9) Have we reached a clear understanding of each other’s spiritual beliefs and needs, and have we discussed when and how our children will be exposed to religious/moral education?

10) Do we like and respect each other’s friends?

11) Do we value and respect each other’s parents, and is either of us concerned about whether the parents will interfere with the relationship?

12) What does my family do that annoys you?

13) Are there some things that you and I are NOT prepared to give up in the marriage?

14) If one of us were to be offered a career opportunity in a location far from the other’s family, are we prepared to move?

15) Does each of us feel fully confident in the other’s commitment to the marriage and believe that the bond can survive whatever challenges we may face?


Those that fail to ask each other the above questions may one day find themselves at the center of an explosive dispute -- with much graver consequences than if had you fully shared your perspectives on these topics beforehand. 

So, if you and your partner are looking to get married, make sure to ask each other this list of questions first, and hopefully you'll be able to lay all your cards on the table and clarify any uncertainties between the two of you. If you are able to negotiate and reach a compromise on the above, you'll be in a great place with your partner.

If these important questions prove helpful to you, share them with your friends, too. 

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Comment by sherrylips on July 18, 2015 at 10:01pm
These r really very good questions 2 ask but it really doesn't matter cause ur partner might just tell u what u want 2 hear. Hmmm
Comment by Lizzette on July 15, 2015 at 7:15am
With a man 39 yrs, don't think he's marry material, Still looking for my knight in shining armor, Really, we both live in different states. SMDH. I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE PROBABLY SAYING RIGHT NOW, BUT IT'S A ..... THANG.
Comment by Anthony Phoenix on July 10, 2015 at 1:25pm
I'm not married right now and I agree with the questions posed in this story and should I ever get to a point in my life when I consider marriage I will try and remember all of these questions. Thanks for sharing with us!
Comment by GospelPan on July 9, 2015 at 12:24pm

I should've told wifey , I want to use a horse only kidding....these are some good questions one should ask before getting advise is this.

Marriage is a dictatorship that runs like a partnership....

Comment by carolyn johnson on July 8, 2015 at 9:25pm
Well if u were together for 15 years i say skip the questions
Comment by Chams on July 8, 2015 at 9:18pm


Comment by pinky on July 8, 2015 at 9:01pm
Lol well that a lot,but I say that best idea because all asking before u go into a dead beat marriage.... An I will have all that written on paper,an sign by him.because word of mouth willn't help me...
Comment by Jerimiah 1:4--10 on July 8, 2015 at 10:49am
In our society, a lot of men do not know the duty of a husband, and likewise a lot of women dont know the duty of a wife, so for all the church lovers, truth is your so called pastors were supposed to be teaching black people that but i guess their too busy teaching falsely so for the people that are married the divorce rate is astounding!
Comment by Big Woman on July 7, 2015 at 9:04am
@Kim Jackson, well said. Communication is key in ANY relationship. People are not mind readers and its childish to think so. Great article.
Comment by Kim Jackson on July 7, 2015 at 8:35am
And we know why he is basically this way, he didn't learn from good n positive role models in good n positive, in non-chauvinistic marriages... And will be alone for life. Sad when we internal our hurt emotions, and use them to be "tough n macho," when in reality, we ARE witnessing that "hurt little boy," in short pants, standing before us... Psuedo-masculinity is REAL!!! Young men HAVE NO CLUE, AS TO HOW A "REAL MAN," PERFORMS... Just imitating the images fing in the media n newspaper... So sad...

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