3-6 million US black women can't find a husband or boyfriend {VIDEO}

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Comment by Mike k on January 16, 2017 at 5:13pm

Well articulated @AfricanGoddess, An ambition for financial security and a good standard of living is something we should all be aspiring to. The problem is we tend to put the cart before the horse in thinking that if/when we acquire wealth and status that can attract a desirable partner.

I reiterate a very applicable quote by Jane Fonda: "We (Humans) are not meant to be perfect; we are meant to be whole".

Comment by AfricanGoddess on January 16, 2017 at 3:26pm

Agree with you on the material and superficial seduction@ Mike K
 

I responded,with my personal feelings,along with discussion I have with the average black women on a regular basis pertaining to relationships(who are/have been in long term relationships by the way).

I saw this video online a few years ago and there is nothing wrong with these black women wanting to have a partner with a degree and financial stability. Yet,there are other underlining components we have to look at truthfully... 

Now,I can't stressed enough,how I am fed up with the propaganda twist on black relationship in the media,which our people are eating up... but,I've heard selling dysfunctional black relationship is big business in the media... Go figure!

Are there issues? Yes! But,we are too focus on all the wrong things,instead of trying to hear,understand and fix ourselves ...so,we run with all types of suggestions/excuses not to love or be with each other.

By the way,there are black females with degrees, financially enable,who will date black men without degree willing to pull his weight,and are dedicated/committed to the relationship too.

This is not lowering one standard,but having expectation... again,there is nothing wrong with black women wanting material security ... except,maybe we are skewed to what a good man is at the end of the day.

As black women,we too have to empathize with black men on how society treats him pertaining to employment(even the degree one) ...We must learn how to compromise and work together,if he is a stand up person.

We are fighting the wrong battles(each other)... our people are truly lost in superficiality and shallowness. Many,can't find the happiness they search for, even with the right looks,degrees and financial stability together,I've seen this close up.

Comment by AfricanGoddess on January 16, 2017 at 1:07pm

@Mr1Stroke& Mike K
Hence my... ( "of course to some there are other factors")

Comment by Mike k on January 16, 2017 at 12:17pm

I wish, @AfricanGoddess, these were the laudable standards we aspired to.

My point is; to get to where one can evaluate whether these standards are a part of a potential mates character, it takes time and conviction to ethical discipline to discern these qualities. Too often we romanticise towards the seductions of material and superficial social status to evaluate for standards while ignoring the many red flags inherent therein.

Comment by mr1stroke on January 16, 2017 at 11:45am

AfricanGoddess that's not what those women are talking about they clearly saying how they are too good for a certain man if a man don't have the same level of education and success and money as they do hr is not good enough but those women did nit have a father to teach them what a man is consist of they did not have a grand mother to teach them woman hood so their mothers had nothing to give them there is a difference between a man and a male figure when you meet a man he will lift your standards higher than they were a man can built from bottom and reach the top with great supports he can assist and protect a man knows his roles whether he got money or not those women do not know these things they shoukd pay me to educate them I bet im younger than most of them making poor choices should not be the blame of good men that is why we play the field and do not worry nor look for relationships we have been bashed for too long that is why black women are in that position and ot will get worse and those women can't even count the amount of men they sleep with so at thread what value do they hold to a man when they have been passed around by bums with money if those men they are sleeping with were true men they would not be talking that crap they would all be married so who are they lying to how much standards do they really have do they look at their selves I the mirror and think about self values and self esteem

Comment by AfricanGoddess on January 16, 2017 at 11:41am

To lower one standard... is to accept abusive,disrespectful,unhealthy relationships,i.e. ( of course to some there are other factors)

Comment by Mike k on January 16, 2017 at 10:46am

Seems we are talking at/past each other instead of to one another. What does it mean: "lower my standards"? All this sounds so so condescending and elitist. A lot of these pitfalls derive from a pathology of behaviours, such as our cavalier approach to intimacy and compromising our most sacred assets so liberally and easily based on a variety of superficial criteria like fancy cars, designer clothes, money etc. Often emulating the oppressors ways as portrayed in their common culture ie. hollywood. They can afford these conducts because there are little consequences to their mistakes and rebounding is just another adventure. We suffer much more lasting and consequential setbacks from these behaviors because our foundations are not yet harmoniously & spiritually bolstered.  

Comment by Contonila Goodman on January 16, 2017 at 6:25am

If any woman is desperate to get married.....she will marry anything that first comes along with the proposal, in my opinion.

Comment by mr1stroke on January 16, 2017 at 12:31am

Irving I just don't get it majority of those women who says they won't lower their standards are the one with a liability of success or very successful or with a Lil bit of education who thinks the average black man is beneath them unless he has a lot of white friends own a few houses and cars they want every thing ready and will not help nor support the average man if you are in the business world you know for a fact those black women are being passed around not only by black men in high places but whites and other races black women. Are the biggest liars and a fraud as soon as they get related desperate they settle with a black man especially when they are getting old and want to get pregnant it's a damn shame and they are in public running their mouths it's so sad they use to be daddy's little princesses now they are every body's hoe what they need to do is invest some of that money and buy some self esteem and common sense and you will have some real standards I refuse to keep quiet and let those nobodys make all black men look like nothing I will always stand up for the hard working black men and those of us who wish we can meet a true black woman who can be the truth back bone like back in the days too bad the last one was Michelle and Obama got her don't blame the rest of us because greed let you make poor choices in men meeting bums your mother never taught you how to be women all she said is go get a man that can take care of you obviously thatlesson is not helping that is why you women are crying and complaining your mother should of Told you like my grand mother told my sisters if you are worth it to a man he will know your worth if you have to ask than that man is not made for you well guess what all 4 of my sisters are successfully married some are in professional field and the others are business owners with their husband now you can tell I'm in a strong family that's why I can speak like that I Wil never bring home any ones than my sisters

Comment by Irving on January 16, 2017 at 12:01am

I agree, mr1stroke

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